Last day on the job

Today marks my last day working at the library. I've been offered a job working in the kitchen at a local diner. Nothing fancy, but it actually pays more than $6 an hour, so I'm taking it.

So I guess until I figure out another way to get computer access, this is goodbye...to all of those people NOT reading my blog.

He's gone

I don't see him in my dreams anymore.  In his place is Catty.  Her lips aren't sewn shut, but she doesn't know how to talk to me anymore.  She doesn't even recognize me.

She looks helpless, confused.  In five years I have not focused so much on my family.  Do they need me now?

I can't go home now.  It's been too long and they can never forgive me.  Small towns have a big memory, as the saying goes.  Or maybe there is no saying.  It's true either way.

I'm getting bored at the library.  I might be looking for a new job soon.  If so, it might be a while until I post again.

Joseph

PS.  Number of total blog views in almost 2 months?  Guess:  0

Another night. Another dream about dad.

I've been dreaming about him for over a week now.  I haven't even spoken to him in almost five years.  Why in the world is this coming up now?

In the dream he doesn't say anything.  Not because he doesn't want to.  His lips are sewn shut...but his eyes they plead with me.  He's begging me.

Why is he begging me?  I have no idea.  I wake up when the tears start streaming from his eyes.

Should I call him?  I've still got the house number, and when they left, they left me a calling card.  Which still has all the minutes on it.

Maybe I should give it a try.

Maybe not.

And the irony award goes to...

You know you are truly helpless, when you are unable to even help those that most need it.  A man asked me for change on my way home last night.  I had to tell him no because I couldn't afford to eat if I gave it to him.

You always wonder how people get in that shape.  Then you wake up and realize you aren't that far away.  Just a few missteps.

I dreamed about dad last night.  Just him.  It was strange.  I'm not used to having my dreams focus on anyone besides her.